After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
