My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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