so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
