I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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