...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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