My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Randomize
