Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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