im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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