yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
