I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
accomplished twins. life is a go
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
