how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
A+ Viking dick
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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