So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
