I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
only if we run a train.
done.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I think I sprained my soul last night
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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