You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
