i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
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