Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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