just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
