i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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