Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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