Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
