We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I will pee on everything he values.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
