My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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