I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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