For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Randomize
