Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Randomize
