K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
