if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
