so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
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