Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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