It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
