Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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