a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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