Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
