just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
