Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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