Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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