I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
