They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
