Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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