Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
