I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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