Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Send help, water and tortillas.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
