at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
