I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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