And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
