Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize