It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Randomize
