so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Randomize
