Where is the hickey?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
