wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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