I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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