i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
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